Not much to blog about lately. We've been busy working away at getting bedrooms painted and furniture moved around. No one has any organized activities going on; the kids are just hanging out with friends. When we can't take any more drywall patching, sanding, scraping, or painting for the day, it's too hot and windy to enjoy ourselves outside, so we just collapse in the house with a cold drink. I've been putting in extra time at work, too, trying to get caught up for the vacation we're taking at the end of the month. There is some unbloggable political maneuvering that's going on there, too, which is affecting a good friend and has me feeling pretty powerless to affect.
All in all, it's enough to make me envy the dog, who stays stretched out on his cool and comfy bed while I'm running around being busy.
July 16, 2008
Dog days
July 01, 2008
Today was a good day
I finished four projects at work and my new staff person was as good as I had hoped in her first presentation to the executive team.
I found out that I got a raise. A REAL raise, not the minuscule COLA the legislature granted but something I will actually notice. And I didn't have to ask for it. [As exempt, non-union employees, we do not get any sort of systematic pay increases other than COLAs, so this is unusual.]
My only other staff position was shared with another department. The person in that role was recently promoted and I got permission to have the vacancy split so I can hire someone with the qualifications I need instead of compromising on only the skills that are relevant to both departments. This will be a huge help given the workload I have coming at me over the next year.
I have the house to myself for the night. I can't remember the last time this happened. I cooked exactly what I wanted for dinner (ravioli with butternut squash and sage) and no one is angling for the TV remote or the computer.
I can look forward to sleeping in tomorrow, dropping the dog off at the kennel, and heading back up to the lake for three more nights.
June 17, 2008
Germination
Somehow the calendar says it is mid-June. The weather outside is still saying March, with an occasional short lapse into May. My mind believes it is still April, because that was the last time I can remember having time to think. The days have just been too busy.
A more thoughtful blogger wrote about her decision to cut back on writing for her blog, saying she needed to have both feet in the three dimensional world right now. I have been feeling overwhelmed by all that's going on in my three dimensional world, and wish I could carve out more space to think. That's partly why I started this blog; if I am going to write things down and publish them, it pushes me to work out my thoughts and follow where they lead. So what happens when I don't have time to do that? I get swallowed up by everything that's going on, and can't seem to climb back into this space and close the door for a bit.
So I won't list all the things that have been making me crazy and keeping me occupied. I will just keep trying to nurture these little seeds and hope that they will grow when I finally get time to plant them. And I will make that time, somehow. [Actually, I know where that time is going to come from, since starting tomorrow I am relieved of middle school homework monitoring duty for the next 11 weeks...]
April 15, 2008
That whooshing sound
...was the last two weeks flying by. In somewhat chronological order, that time has included:
- a review at work, for which I had to write all the reports, organize the documentation, etc.
- the kids' spring break. Because of bullet #1 above, I couldn't get away until late in the week, so we took a flying trip to Seattle for what turned out to be as much art and culture as we could cram into three days: the Seattle Art Museum (Roman art from the Louvre and Ghiberti's Gates of Paradise, and a bit of the new Olympic Sculpture Park); the Opera (Gianni Schicchi and The Enchanted Child); and just hanging out at places like Uwajimaya and the most noncommercial mall ever (live jazz! endless chess games!)
- the visit of an online friend from the east coast, prompting a great dinner in the Seattle area (which I was late to, again because of #1, but at least I didn't miss it entirely)
- an overnight train trip (and back) to somewhere in the middle of a very large state, where I spent several days at a tribal college. Managed to get off the train and into a location with a TV in time to see the second half of the women's NCAA final (and its unfortunate conclusion)
- soccer season started for Daughter; Son's lacrosse experience continues and he has added the school swim team (bringing that group up to four members!)
March 28, 2008
Stuck, again
- For the second time, I am stuck on the wrong side of the state because of bad weather. What happened to my mountain pass karma of the past 15 years? and spring?
- Phhht on rental car companies that are too cheap to even give you a snow scraper. I might have thought more seriously about waiting out the pass closure had I had something besides my hands to clean snow off the car. In reality, though, I am too much the child of my father to contemplate driving through the mountains without chains, something to shovel with, gloves and boots, and food and water. So I'm staying put.
- Now that I'm on my third night in a hotel room with HBO, I've watched
fivesix episodes of In Treatment, and one of John Adams. JA is definintely something I will add to my DVD list--I'd like to watch the entire series. IT is overhwelming, but once I start I can't tear myself away. It absolutely confirms that I am not cut out for psychotherapy and it's a good thing I went in an entirely different direction with my psych degrees. The last episode with Sophie gave me chills. - My kids are also holding true to form; since I can't get home, they are both sick. Thankfully it doesn't seem to be more than your basic kid virus (fever, congestion, cough), but their track record over the years is quite amazing.
March 25, 2008
Not quite yet
Sometimes the kids seem to be growing up really fast. Other times, not so much. This past weekend we were discussing the schedule of activities -- this has been one of those weeks where we have not had everyone home for dinner because of all the practices, meetings, rehearsals, etc. When we got to planning for Easter Sunday, I was running through the list of events: "Well, I have to be at both church services because the choir is singing, but the rest of you can come at the usual time, and then we'll go over to Grandma and Granddad's later in the afternoon for dinner...". Son interrupted and said, "And we're going to have an egg hunt, right? In the morning, like we always do? You're going to hide eggs, aren't you?"
Now, our egg hunts have not been spectacular in any way, either in the quantity of treats or the ingenuity of hiding places. It's always too cold or wet to do anything outside, and anything left in the house has to be up off the floor and out of range of the dog. So 80% of the plastic eggs are visible if you just stand in the center of the living room -- it's no longer a challenge. But even if there are no lingering illusions about a mysterious bunny, evidently the egg hunt has reached the status of tradition.
Bowing to the inevitable, Spouse and I filled up about two dozen plastic eggs and scattered them around the room before we went to sleep on Saturday night. Early Sunday morning, there was no excited child waking us up far earlier than we wanted to; instead it was the alarm I set so I wouldn't be late for the early service. We came downstairs to find the kids waiting patiently, curled up in the big chairs and watching "Mars Attacks!" on TV, with the eggs in plain sight, untouched. Not quite grown up, but closer.
March 07, 2008
Short month, long days
February technically has fewer days, but it's got to be the longest month of the year. The month started out rather frantically, what with getting stranded in Seattle by the weather. After that it never really recovered. No one was really dramatically ill, but all of us felt off - the kids each missed a day of school and I left work early several times with a migraine. The sky is grey, the hills are grey-brown, and everything in town is coated with dust from the road sand that hasn't yet been cleaned up. Lots of my time at home was spent with Son, trying to get him caught up with homework and coaching him through assignments with very muddled directions. Daughter got caught up in some ugly "mean girl" dramas at school, and was on the receiving end of some behavior that bordered on bullying, leaving her very bewildered and unhappy. I remember that crap from 5th grade on, but not in 3rd grade! We're all out of sorts and ready for spring. Now we need to survive the time change this weekend.
Click here to continue....February 22, 2008
Too funny, too true
As seen at Pharyngula: a piece by Carl Hiaasen on science education and the Florida state board of education. Coincidentally, I picked up Stormy Weather at the library the other day - reading that is definitely on my list of things to do this weekend. I'm ready for some down time and a good laugh. And I need to recharge before my Sunday afternoon task: driving a vanload of middle schoolers home from an overnight church camp. At which they are not going to shower. Another reason to be thankful for the state seatbelt law that states children under 13 should not ride in the front passenger seat. It's an hour and a half trip... think I'll survive?
Click here to continue....February 07, 2008
Travel and politics
We made it to Seattle, but I'm not sure yet we'll make it home. We heard the train wasn't running through the mountains today, and three feet of new snow is forecast between now and Saturday. The highways are closed frequently, and when they're open the driving is treacherous. There is a different urgency to getting home, since our state is holding caucuses on Saturday and given the choices the state Democratic Party has made, if you want your vote to count toward the outcome of the nominating convention, you have to participate in the caucus - they aren't using the results of the primary vote later this month.
I really don't want to miss this opportunity. I have been disappointed, frustrated, enraged, saddened, incredulous, and dismayed - sometimes all at once - by the actions of the U.S. presidency over the past 8 years. I don't want to miss the chance to be heard and have my point of view count. I want to be able to open the newspaper and read the President's words or watch the President speak on TV without cringing. I want to be able to believe in the country's leadership again, and have hope that the best things about this country will be intact when my children become adults. I'm ready for change.
UPDATE: I missed the caucus. The earliest flight I could take was Saturday night, and another co-worker was in the area with her car, so I ended up driving home with her. The long way around the Cascades - 7.5 hours of driving instead of the usual 2.5. We did get home 15 minutes ahead of the flight, though, and 7 hours before the pass opened, so it was the right choice. But I missed the caucus.
February 05, 2008
Jinx
That last post? Today, not so much. Turns out my boss can't cover that meeting after all, so I may still have to go. I'm also scheduled to go to Seattle later this week, and the passes have been closed so often due to snow/avalanche control that alternate travel plans were frantically created today. This now involves flying one way (ugh) and taking the train back (more pleasant, but inconvenient given that we're staying at the airport). Then came the news that my brother's town in Arkansas was hit by a tornado -- he and his wife are fine, as are her relatives, but it was very scary and there were fatalities nearby so everyone is pretty shaken. And, for the third week in a row, in the face of multiple conversations about honesty (and enforced consequences for lying) Son missed yet another homework assignment and lied to cover it up (or tried to, since he got caught. Again.) Can I just go back to yesterday?
Click here to continue....February 04, 2008
February
... is off to a decent start. First, we have had above-freezing temperatures for the first time in I can 't remember. Second, I have the best kind of committee duty this month -- planning a wine tasting. That meant I got to rush off from the middle school PTA meeting tonight to help select wines for an event later this month (cabernet and chocolate, of course). This (2004 cab) and this (the 2005 - looks like the web page is out of date) were my favorites. And third-- I was in danger of missing the actual wine tasting event later this month due to an out of town meeting for work, but it turns out my boss will already be in the area and can cover the obligation, so I can stay put here. Bonus: it was still light out at 5 PM today when I backed the car into the narrow driveway outside the performing arts center so Son could unload his bass for his orchestra rehearsal. Plus I actually saw a robin last weekend in the juniper bushes outside my friend's front door. I think things are looking up.
Click here to continue....January 16, 2008
Trying something new
I love books. I spend a lot of time reading (probably too much). I've been part of a monthly book group for more than 12 years now, and there are only a few times when I didn't get the book read. I can't imagine being without access to books.
Reading is one of the things that can truly take me out of where I am and get the wheels spinning in my mind to quiet down. Reading for distraction, however, isn't always conducive to really thinking about and remembering what I've read. That's fine for paperback mysteries and the like, but there are many books I'd like to remember better. So I've started to keep track of them in the sidebar. I'll try to do some reviews at the end of every month, and I'd love to hear what you thought if you've read any of the same books.
In other things new and blog-related, I heard from two whole people as a result of my delurking plea (thank you MLL and MA!). Then last night I got three comments on other posts, all showing up in the comment box as strings of question marks and in my email as kanji characters. I'm not showing any hits from non-English speaking countries, so I guess I'll put that down to a spambot and be thankful it wasn't worse...
PS: social studies project is ALMOST done. If he didn't have math homework, he could probably turn it in tomorrow - and I'm still tempted to keep him up to finish it, just because I am so ready to have it over with.
December 31, 2007
Year's end
Only a few hours left in 2007. The aftermath of a migraine may not be the best place from which to sum up the year, but somehow it seems I should do this today and not put it off until tomorrow.
Several of the blogs I read have been summing up the year by means of their posts: the first line of the first post each month, or variations on that theme. I didn't post anything between August 2006 and February 2007, so that doesn't seem to be the best approach for my sporadic blogging habits.
In some ways it seems like I haven't moved much this year; the things on my mind in my first post of 2007 are still very present. And I don't think I'm really going to solve that particular concern, or find a way to make it go away - I just have to learn to live with it better. So in that spirit, here are some things that were memorable about 2007: some mundane, some fleeting, some that will stay with me, all part of the fabric.
- Friends and friendships are what keep me going. Sometimes it's being able to escape for coffee and conversation for just an hour. Or the unexpected pleasure of things falling into place to spend an entire day with someone whose friendship extends across my whole life. Even online, with people I've never met, discovering a connection , recognizing a common experience, or reading something that expands my perspective can bring new energy into my life.
- Those moments when you aren't expected to do or be anything for anyone, and are just free to enjoy yourself: walking along the beach and watching the water; driving through the Eastern Shore in a fun blue Mini; paddling a kayak or cross-country skiing; getting lost in a good book. One thing I am learning is while it's a wonderful lift to have these joys occur unexpectedly, they are no less pleasurable when I schedule them and make time for them.
- I am continually amazed by my kids. Yes, I can be astounded by how well they can push my buttons and do all the things that make me feel the most frazzled and impatient. But they are very much coming into their own as individuals with unique strengths and that is an awesome thing to watch. I am grateful that they still ask me to read to them and play with them, and are willing to learn things that I can teach them. They seem to be growing up faster and faster. I know I can't hold onto them, or make time stand still, but I can appreciate the time we have together now and the ways in which they are growing and maturing.
December 21, 2007
At the lake
We've spent most of the past week at the lake (where the promised new wireless Internet turned out to be very sporadic... sorry for the lack of posts). It's so nice to be here in the winter. It's still a great place in the summer, but winter is so peaceful in comparison - no crowds of people, and QUIET - the hordes of droning personal watercraft are nowhere to be found. It's time for watching the clouds change, drinking wine by the fireplace, cross-country skiing along the shore, watching bald eagles soar overhead.
Click here to continue....December 10, 2007
Growing Up
We celebrated Son's 12th birthday this past weekend. In a lot of ways, he's still a kid, and he wanted a birthday party. He wanted his friends around, and ice cream cake (and presents), but didn't want it to feel like a kids' party. Activities for middle-schoolers around here are limited, and even the ice rink and the bowling alley get booked up with holiday parties this time of year. So after much discussion, we opted to invite a group of his friends to see The Golden Compass when it opened on Friday, and then have pizza and cake back at our house.
I read the book shortly after it first came out, and the remaining two in the trilogy as they were released. [Son hasn't read them yet; as much as I might wish for it, he does not share my passion for obsession with reading.] I was aware that the movie was the subject of attacks by those of the fundamentalist, intolerant persuasion, and that rumors were floating around online that it was "toned down" as part of an underhanded plan to lull unsuspecting children into the storyline and then clobber them after they were hooked with atheist/anti-God/anti-Christian propaganda. But I didn't really think much of it; the usual suspects were in front of this effort in the media, so I didn't give it much credence. Plus all of the kids in question had seen the Harry Potter movies, and the LOTR trilogy, and Monty Python and the Holy Grail and the like; there had been previous exposure to violence, irreverence, and PG-13 ratings.
We made phone calls instead of sending out invitations; the people who own the local movie theaters don't advertise in the paper (long story) and don't post the show times until after they decide on Thursday night which screen the new film will be on, so I wanted to be able to explain that we wouldn't know exact times until that day. We talked to some families, and left voice messages for others, and I figured the logistics were taken care of. The next day, Son called me at work as soon as he arrived home after school. He wanted to know why M and W thought the move was "against God" and said they had told him that their parents would not allow them to go. He didn't want to have the party without them, so could we please go bowling instead?
This got my blood boiling for several reasons. Intolerance in general just gets to me, and I've seen more in this town than I can stand, and this time it was impacting my own kid, so that got my hackles up. What really bothered me was that none of the adults in question had the consideration to share their concerns with another adult; instead, they let the kids deal with it. And when 11 and 12 year olds are dealing with complex issues of religion, belief, and tolerance... well, they're just not equipped. They don't have the context, or the experience, and I know in Son's case he is just starting to understand how and why adults believe different things.
I was not under the impression I could - or should - talk another adult out of a parenting choice they made for their child; that's certainly their right, as it is mine. But don't have your kid carry the message for you, because the kid isn't prepared to deliver it, and my kid isn't prepared to receive it. What wasn't clear at this point was whether the parents expected us to change our plans based on their views, or if it was solely peer pressure that Son was getting, mixed with his own reluctance to give up any time with his friends.
So after Son's school orchestra concert that night, even though it was already past time for him to be asleep, we did a crash course on the content of His Dark Materials; how churches can differ on the spectrum of absolute obedience vs. free will; and symbolism, allegory, and how a fantasy story can have multiple interpretations. I didn't give these topics what they deserved, but he grasped enough that he understood better how people could disagree but that it was also possible - and important - to be respectful of one another's opinions. We also talked about the fact that he had three friends who were excited about going to the movie with him, and under what circumstances he would feel comfortable about rescinding that invitation. There was one attempt at finding a loophole: "Can't we just say the tickets are sold out and do something else?", but in general, he got it.
Fast forward to Friday, when I finally have the show times. I call the two families in question again to let them know what time we'll be back from the movie so the boys can come join us for dinner & video games, etc. This time I actually get to speak with adults, and it turns out that while W's father says (rather adamantly) that W will not be going to the movie, M's father says it's fine. M's father also recognizes that things got garbled somehow between the kids, and apologizes for not communicating directly. That helps. So I take 5 kids to the theater, and the 6th will meet us at the house afterward.
The boys love the movie; the action scenes were great, it was suspenseful, the special effects were very cool - particularly the daemons and the armored bears; there were big loud (but not gory) battle scenes. By the time we get home, W (who lives around the block) had just arrived, and the food is almost ready. As kids do, they move on quickly to what's immediately at hand, and any tension is forgotten. Over dinner, they are immersed in recounting highlights from previous video gaming sessions. W is in the midst of dramatizing some exploits playing Halo; this is a game that is not permitted in our household, but W has two older brothers (17 and 21) and plays it often. Suddenly from across the table, another one of the guests says "Wait a minute. You weren't allowed to see the movie, but you can play Halo at home? That doesn't make any sense!"
Welcome to adulthood. And parenting - even more so. Choices. Lots of choices, some that are easy and "make sense," some very hard. Son is growing up, in more ways than one. Though I was very gratified at how he started his day on Sunday, his actual birthday: when he woke up, I was relaxing on the couch under a blanket with a cup of coffee. I said "good morning" to him, and more than half expected a surly grunt in reply, or a request to play GameCube before breakfast. Instead he dropped onto the couch next to me and said "The 12-year-old wants to snuggle for a while." Thanks, Son. Happy Birthday to you, with much love.
December 06, 2007
Tis the season...
... for busyness! The holiday rush has started. I like the festive events, and the fact that we actually get out of the house to do something more than grocery shop or take the kids to Red Robin. But the logistics have me worn out, and we're not even to the second weekend in December yet.
Last weekend's event schedule: one dress-up holiday party (which involved finding a sitter for the kids), one music performance at church, and one symphony concert with my parents. Plus it snowed all weekend, followed by freezing rain, so just getting around was a chore.
Son had a school music concert on Wednesday. His birthday is this weekend; because Saturday and Sunday are already booked, we're having his friends over on Friday. (More coming on that one, involving our own personal version of the "controversy" over the movie The Golden Compass. I have to calm down some more before I can write coherently about it, though.) Saturday night some friends are having a party; we can't get a sitter, so we'll have to park the kids at my parents' for a while. Sunday I have an extra choir rehearsal and then the obligatory appearance at my boss's holiday open house, followed by a family birthday dinner for Son. And I'm realizing that I've done almost no shopping for Christmas gifts that need to be sent out of town. I think this will be the year of online shopping and direct shipping.
You may notice that the spirit of the season is markedly absent from this post. I am hoping I regain my perspective shortly; if Son has a good birthday celebration that will help. In the meantime, deep breaths, Cabernet, and the hot tub are treating the symptoms.
November 30, 2007
NaBloPoMo: Reflections
I made it - an entire month of daily posts. Not sure this is really an achievement, though. Some reflections:
- I don't get the point of posting when you really have nothing to say. I don't have the time to do it, and why would I expect others to have time to waste reading it? Now I can say I've done NaBloPoMo, but I don't think I'm likely to repeat.
- I did learn some new technical things about photos, Flickr, and uploading music.
- My traffic count this month alone was equivalent to what was generated over the entire prior existence of this blog (32 months). I haven't examined my stats to see where people are coming from, but I've only had one comment from someone who appears to have found me through the NaBloPoMo randomizer.
- I didn't do as well as I had hoped at commenting on others' blogs, but I have created some new connections, and maybe even have the beginnings of a blogroll.
- Blogging is an investment of time; thoughtful blogging even more so. I'd rather read a thoughtful post once or twice a week than daily drivel, and I really admire the bloggers who can keep that up. I still aspire to be one of them someday.
- (Edited to add) I will probably continue to post inane random stuff, and that is part of the fun of blogging. I just wish it could be more, more often, but I'm not sure I can pull off the tradeoffs needed to make that happen at this point. It's kind of like the difference between conversation and writing for publication. I want to keep the conversation going, but every once in a while I'd like to be able to pull out something that makes someone stop and think for a minute. Maybe that's just my ego talking.
November 27, 2007
Multitasking
Is it really only two days since we got home from our Thanksgiving trip? It seems like at least a week - there has been so much crammed into that short time. Work has been crazed - we are on deadline for several proposals, and there are some awkward situations involving collaborative projects with outside groups that I am going to have to sort out. At home, there's a huge stack of mail to sort through. I experimented this evening with trying to upload music files to post here, and am having only partial success. There are only a few days left in NaBloPoMo, and I wanted to figure out how to post some of Son's music. But the kids are calling upstairs to tell me that A Charlie Brown Christmas is on TV, so I think I'll stop multitasking and sit down with them instead.
Click here to continue....November 15, 2007
NaBloPoMo: The Halfway Mark
I've made it through half of November with daily posts. The experience so far:
- I was hoping to have some more thoughtful posts up by now instead of mostly random ramblings. I've composed several in my head; mostly in the car, so they've never been written down. The travel schedule has just been too much.
- Yesterday was a close call. I was floored that my 2-month-old laptop wouldn't work with the wireless access point in the hotel (verified by tech support after 20 minutes on the phone). The hotel I was in was shaped like a big horseshoe and I was literally in the second farthest room from the front desk and the pay-to-connect computers. It would have been a shorter walk to go outside, but it was dark and rainy and some of the parking lot lights were out. I may need a Blackberry or an iPhone before I try this again!
- In addition to posting regularly, I am trying to comment more often on others' blogs. I'm having only moderate success so far; I just keep running out of time.
- I also want to learn some new skills, like how to embed a video clip or song. No time to figure that out yet.
- On the plus side, this feels like a project I can finish -- unlike the long, complex process-oriented things that are piling up on me at work. Simple is good, right?
November 11, 2007
Communal dining experience
We had a couple of experiences this weekend where we ended up sharing a table with people we didn't know. Usually it's fun; you meet someone new, converse for a while, and go your separate ways. Every once in a while it verges into the weird. I've been asked to take pictures of people I don't know before, but I've never had them rearrange their food to be sure everything was visible and make a special request to get it all into the photo. Or had them ask me to retake said photo -- twice -- because it wasn't to their satisfaction. And it's not like this was a unique or unusual meal; it was French toast with a side of ham, coffee, and juice. It was in the dining car on a train, so I guess that was reason enough. In fact, we learned that he had been on the train for three days and had documented every meal in this fashion. Maybe there is nothing else to take pictures of to prove you were on a train trip? I don't know. At just after 6:00 AM, I was too befuddled by lack of coffee and sleep to do anything but comply politely. You just never know what to expect.
Click here to continue....
